Horoscope for 3/22/00:

“You find yourself remembering someone from the past.”

Doh.

For the past week or so, Chris has been on my mind an alarming amount. It seems as if there are a million little reminders of him every day. All of this is conspiring to create a longing within me to talk to him. Not the serious, “we need to talk” kind of conversation, but the laughter filled, anecdotal type of conversations we shared at the beginning of our friendship. I find talking with him is what I miss most of all from the demise of our relationship.

When the brackets were announced for the NCAA, I immediately thought of him and how jazzed he must be because his beloved Seton Hall was in the tourney. And then when they advanced, I smiled to myself, imagining his joy at such an event. Lord help him, if they make it to the Final Four!

Certain songs on the radio conjure his spectre. Hearing a Blues Traveler song yesterday, I was reminded of the tape he made for me, comprised entirely of their music and how he enjoined me to *really* listen to the lyrics to get insight into his personality. I remember, too, him bragging in an early conversation about being “neighbors” with John Popper and then admitting, chagrined, “well, neighboring towns, anyway.” And then today, on the public radio station, a lilting version of “Whole of the Moon” brought my thoughts to him and our mutual love of Irish bands and music.

Little things remind me of late night conversations where we learned truths about one another, where we discussed our respective families and how much they meant to us. Walking through CVS drug store last week, I smiled to myself when I saw the display of plush toys from “The Rocky and Bullwinkle Show.” He loved the show, and imparted his love for “that crazy moose” to his young nephews. I remembered stories he told of college shenanigans involving a kidnapped Bullwinkle and ransom notes. Most of all, I remember his laughter when he’d tell me these stories.

It must be the time of the year. I always miss him more in March and April. Is it May yet?

Please let it be May soon.